Respect

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A friend recently told me there is some truth to the phrase “All You Need Is Love”.  I’ve been blessed to experience the shine of Love; not only from a lover, but from friends and family as well.  Brightness appeared when I stopped searching the darkness for a light bringing me to the realization that the light was shining within me.  Do you want to know why?  Well, I am that light I have been seeking all along.

Throughout my lifetime I never knew that I have been dimming my own inner light so as not to blind others.  Conditioned by societal fears and insecurities I pondered on what is safe or what is the “Right thing to Do”  which caused me to get caught up in second guessing myself and questioning my own authentic heart.  My insecurities brought me to a place of awkwardness for the Love I wanted to share with another plus even the act of accepting the Love of another made me feel exposed.  I associated my compassion and curiosity for people as neediness and weakness.  Once I recognized these feelings within myself, I was able to observe all the dimmed lights around me. We all have a tendency not to shine as bright as we are. Love is the dial that turns that light up. We must work from within to be able to access that switch. First, observe and admire who you are deep down.  Accept and appreciate that unique individuality that we all possess, and offer that special kind of Love to one another.  Holding that Love space for each other is like being a recharging station for one another.  We have the power to recharge our Love light within ourselves.  The key is to allow yourself to be silly yet deep, and vulnerable yet have boundaries.  With every encounter we can practice this kind of exchange with one another.  The mere thought of this has my heart bursting inside with joy and gratitude.

Take the time to bear witness to others stories and experiments with life.  Be open to possibilities that stem from the heart rather than the head.  Express feelings with one another, yet do not make another responsible for yours.  Open communication can be challenging at first and even a bit hurtful during the learning process. The more we refrain from passing judgement and allow each other to practice with each other, we can empower ourselves to respect the fact that we all working out our own stuff.  Having clear intentions while communicating is important and gives certainty that you are coming from a place of love and not attacking.  Maybe this way we can give each other a bit of a break and know it’s just a learning curve.  Each one of these steps just brings our authentic self forward without fear and brightens your internal light.

So, for instance, if you truly are doing your best to communicate your needs to someone and it comes across hurtful or blaming to them.  It is their responsibility to express how that felt, without finding fault in you.  Open communication is a learning experience where all parties have to participate with full trust and no fear. Basically we are holding up a mirror for one another to recognize how our words make each other feel; as well as reflecting their own light back to them.  It takes a lot of LOVE and courage to be honest with another person, and the greatest amount of courage to be honest with yourself.  You share a great gift with a person when you are able to have healthy boundaries and still can agree to disagree.  Being heard and respected with sincerity lends force to the light we shine. Think of your internal light as a spotlight …remember your mom always told you to be careful where you direct your flashlight as a kid?  Well it’s the same concept your not going to just beam that light into someones face without warning, be prepared that not everyone is ready for that kind of exposure.  This will take time as we mature into holding our light and others with respect. Judgement and expectations of others to receive our love are unrealistic, if anything it just blankets the truth and dims both of our lights. If we can take responsibility for ourselves as our own internal parent we can allow that shine not to feel so scary or mistrusting.  All we have is each other to express this burning desire to be seen and admired for that beautiful Love we all carry.

Do you know who you are?  Have you witnessed yourself lately?  Do you recognize the impact your presence has on your friends and family?  Do the homework cause you will be surprised how each one of us has a role in this crazy world.  It’s time to find yours.  I encourage and challenge you all.  Share your experiences, when you do you could be a guiding light for that Love to shine.  There are many people that feel the same way you do.  We are all little Love Fireflies.  When we unite, and share, we create a beautiful chain of Love that shines and helps light the way.

Editor – A Antonio

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When your past stories reemerge, the toxins are soon to follow.  It’s tough to stomach the old ways of your defense mechanisms.  You start to suffer from “food for thought” poisoning.

So many knots in the stomach cause you limitations: preventing you from following through, keeping you from taking chances, or inhibiting you from showing up.

You build countless excuses for why you aren’t available for success.  I mean, hell, you just don’t feel well; you have too many jangled nerves creating a myriad of toxic thoughts echoing throughout your system.  Oh, we poor victimized humans, casualties of our own circumstances.  Well, now is the time to take a dose of good old “Pep Talk Dismiss All”.

Consider these cramps of discomfort as signs that you are growing beyond what served your past.  These old ways may have nurtured and comforted you previously but now that you have developed a more mature palate it’s just like consuming fast food.  As you out grow the FAST “Solution” method of handling yourself you’ll develop a more serene self.

For me, I see now that the crumbs of my past, for which I am expected to survive on, no longer serve me well.  I prefer to sit down and trust that my needs will be met. It is more like setting a lovely table to process the events of my life.

Imagine a 4 to 7 course meal.  What’s cooking?  It’s time to figure out the menu.  Put a real plan in place.  If you want a new job or an event you desire to attend, you look to the past where you took short cuts or acted out of fear. Perhaps you got the job or you attended the event but how much did you sacrifice along the way? It’s time to stop settling and slowly lose your soul in the process. That’s why SOUL FOOD is so good, because it’s filled with LOVE.  What I am saying is take the steps along the way to make sure you have healthy boundaries.

Time to plan the menu for a 4-course meal:

  1. Express what you want or what is right for you, “How You Roll”
  2. Be vulnerable & trust you’re worth it.  Risk letting go of what may not have served you in the past. Qualify your desires.
  3. Compromise, realize it may not be all about you and there’s a give and take.  Don’t take things personally.
  4. Be open and receiving. We are all human with degrees of insecurities.  This teaches compassion for others and us.  Sometimes the greatest joy in humanity is to be able to give to another human being. So maybe you allowing someone to give to you — is actually YOU GIVING TO THEM.

Intimate relationships are on the menu too.  Repeat steps 1 through 4 and plan for a 7-course meal:

  1. Check in with each other – Communicate.  People grow and fears emerge.  Hold a special tender space for each other.
  2. Bare witness:  keep each other accountable.  Never fear to hold a mirror up to what they may not want to see.
  3. The most DELICIOUS item on the menu: appreciate and express your love.  There are a lot of us that don’t want to be the one that loves the other person more than they love us.  So without looking weak we tend to play it safe.  Yet in the long run we miss out on that precious feeling of admiration and joy that can fill our hearts.

It’s all about respecting and trusting you. Once you can do that, you have the ability to respect and trust all others.  Once your souls are filled with your own well-being, you can have enough to share with others.  Feed your soul first then you can be of service and a positive example for all humanity.

I know for me I occasionally backslide into my fast food solutions and quickly feel the difference in my body.  I become insecure and/or angry.  Once I purge out my fears and acknowledge that I may still need a healthier solution.  I remember I have no need to go “there” any longer.

Stop and listen before swallowing the ideas you are presented.  Consciously take in what is nurturing your soul.  Is it from the ravishing depths of fear or from the grateful gardens of love?

Recognize if you tend to go to the side of fear, you may need to fill yourself up with more joys that feed your soul.  Start making a list of events, people, crafts, and hobbies that just takes you to that yummy place. So when you see the food truck of “fear” coming your way, you can take a breath and refocus on your diet of blissful foods.’’

I hope that helps. Think of this a “recipe for success”

from My Soul Kitchen to Yours.16098-jessica-biel-1920x1200-celebrity-wallpaper

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Are we really different from one another? Men from Women, Country from Country, Nationality from Nationality?  I’ve been noticing lately with all of this Worldwide access to one another over the internet, as well as talking with friends and family that we all follow a common ‘like”.  We all want to be Loved, have Empathy, be Acknowledged, Appreciated, Respected, Joyful, and have Peace of Mind. For me Love is the glue that can keep all of these elements together. Unconditional, International, Unexplainable LOVE.  Once we open our hearts to each other I see how a net of trust forms that can create a safe space to give and receive.  Sharing that energy leads us into Empathy.   Once we have that understanding or being aware of, we can’t help but experience a state of Acknowledgement.   When we can have that recognition we can then Appreciate.  With that understanding of something or someone’s value or worth, it would undoubtedly lead us to having Respect.  With a sense of fondness, enthusiasm, passion, devotion brings the energy to Enjoy and rejoice in the human condition.  As we rejoice in that moment, sharing that energy whether it is as calming as Contentment, Lightheartedness, to Exhilaration or Ecstasy we are in a state of well-being.  AHH I don’t know about you but my heart is wide open with LOVE.  Mind you I don’t think we can walk around unconscious.  There is a feeling of self-awareness that is our indicator of our boundaries.  But whether your Relationship is coming from a Spiritual place or a Personal place, it starts with Love.  I guess it starts with Loving one another or Loving a God, for that matter Loving anything.  Having Love in our hearts.  There is no doubt why people find comfort in the phrase “As God is my witness”.  It starts with the Love and builds from there.  I’ll start by saying I Love that all of you that taken the time to open your hearts and read what I have to say.  I feel a sense of communion which brings all of these stages to light.

 

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reflectionnnnThe only way I hear myself is through your Ears …so who’s listening?  Recently I’ve discovered my reaction to others reflection can be defensive. Yet sometimes their reflection can show me an image of myself that is in true alignment with the state of mind I’m in.  When your out of alignment your first reaction is to be defensive, redirect, justify and even blame.  So when I feel these emotions surfacing I take a moment to reflect myself at that image I’ve given off.  What they see is an image I have of myself.  So if I am not happy with that reflection I better start to change my perceptions and view myself in different ways.  Self esteem goes beyond just your looks, it is a core belief that you are lovable.  I’ve observed that most of us have a hard time realizing our worth.  Or should I say be comfortable to allow love into our hearts.  When we find excuses for how others treat us it is a sure sign that we are lowering our standards to protect ourselves from being hurt.  I had a book of justifications that was so big that I realize now why I renamed it to “War & Peace”.  Justifying and reasoning away your self worth is devaluing your desires.  We all have the right to be happy and loved.  Just because you are a mother, father, sister, brother or even the president you have a right to be happy and loved.  Yes we all signed up to have responsibilities and with that comes sacrifice.

Taking control of your life.  How does that look?  So many responsibilities and choices daily… finding more opportunities and disappointments along the way that could keep you frozen in your tracks.  Well today I have seen how my life has changed because I am not scared of what the unknown can be.  I’ve seen how this image I wanted so badly of myself is maybe a skewed picture of staying safe and in control.  I chose now to let go of the known and aligning with what I’ve desired all this time.  Now that the shift has occurred I can see clearly that “Image” of myself that is beautiful and perfect with all of her fears and desires. We have a choice to see worthlessness or we can see within seconds a radiant capable spirit.  Don’t be scared of the limitless possibilities or fear your leaving your loved ones behind or disappointing them.  Be that leader that can show by example to love yourself and have everything you desire and then some.  Go forth you Spiritual Warriors and let’s set an example together.  My ears are here for you are you can you see yourself?

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Our Truth . . . When someone tells you their truth, it should be your truth.    I don’t know about you but this lesson has been haunting me for years.  I realize now that as humans we need to honor that truth.  Even if we don’t understand it to be OUR truth.  Cause when you dive in deeper you can see what is it that you can’t except about their truth?  That your truth may not be true?  We can not push our opinions, beliefs or for that mater ourselves on anyone that is respecting themselves with their beliefs.  We need to respect ourselves and not be set up for rejection, confrontation, and for that matter War.  Who do we think we are to believe that if we just say this, or if we beat them over the head then that, that they will change their views?  What really is behind your point of view?  Stop beating yourself up and start to realize your own truth.  Reality is looking at you straight between the eyes.  Be confident enough in your own beliefs to know that no matter whoever else disagrees it doesn’t change what is True for you.  Sometime you can surprise yourself and they can shine a light to broaden your truth.  That is respecting yourself and others.   I want to apologize to whomever I have pushed my opinion on or looked down on them for not living in my truth.  In fact I respect them and love them for being honest and revealing themselves in their truth.  As the saying goes when someone tells you who they are believe them. Honor that honesty and allow space to maybe not share religions with everybody, or share the same music, or even share the same bed.  If we as humans start to recognize the differences between each other we can start to see how very similar we are.  What begins with Truth ends with Truth.

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